Help Your Student to Fit In at School

Help Your Student to Fit In at School
Blog Categories

Of course you want your student to be an individual who is not a slave to peer pressure, but a sense of belonging is essential to the health and wellbeing of every student. If your student feels like they don’t fit in, there are ways in which you can encourage greater social interaction so that they feel part of a group and enjoy a happy social life. Students who do have a healthy social circle will do better academically.

A sense of self-worth

Foster a sense of self-identity in your student by providing positive reinforcement. Focus on their strengths and encourage them to find an identity through what they wear and what they think. Teach them that being generous and kind to everyone, regardless of the clique or group they come from, is the best way to make friends.

Active listening

As students mature, they may be going through difficult social situations or bullying without telling you because they fear your involvement. Often students don’t want advice or are afraid that you will take action that will embarrass them. Instead, practice active listening — listen to your students without offering advice or criticizing. Instead, try phrases like: “It sounds like you had a really bad day…”, “I’m so sorry that that happened to you…” or “I hear what you are saying…” Active listening is a great way to get your student to communicate; you can monitor the situation to see if they are experiencing any bullying or if they are managing on their own. Establishing communications can be really tricky with older students, so persevere. If your students ask for advice, be constructive rather than critical. Active listening is really challenging for parents as they want to make things better. Instead you have to separate your needs from what your student needs. Establishing a connection is more important so that your student will turn to you when they are in real trouble or in need of help. Resist the urge to solve problems or dispense advice in favor of creating connections.

Check in with teachers

If you notice a change in your student’s behavior or circle of friends, check in with their teachers to see if they are doing ok. Teachers and councilors can help you get an insight into events at school and how best to deal with them. Periods of not fitting in socially are completely normal. Perhaps your student has changed grades or schools or maybe they have had a falling out with their clique. Learning to deal with these changes and learning to fit in are all part of growing up. It’s difficult for parents because they often have insights they want to share or solutions to their student’s problems and they have a natural desire to want to help their children. It’s important to maintain a connection with your students, so often you will have to listen to them and resist the urge to get involved. That way, when they really need help, they know they can come to you and are more likely to do so.

More Posts Like This
  • Celebrating Influential Women in Education During Women's History Month

    March 1st marked the beginning of Women’s History Month! All of us here at Tutor Doctor would like to thank the many magnificent women that have changed the way we look at education. Here are some influential women in education that we’d like to thank for making the world a better place!

    Read More
  • 3 Steps to Help International Students Get into the American University of Their Dreams

    America is home to some of the best colleges and universities in the world. For international students, the process of applying and getting accepted to a school in the United States can be complicated and confusing. Thankfully, some simple steps can help get you moving in the right direction toward an acceptance from your top choice.

    Read More
  • Thinking with the End in Mind – Keep Goals in Sight

    This blog post provides a great summary of a chapter from our recently published book, Academic Success Formula: How ordinary students get extraordinary results. The chapter was written by Ashley Mulcahy, a Tutor Doctor franchisee out of Orange County, California, who has more than 100 tutors in 20 cities.

    Read More